I'm allergic to this place..

*cough* *cough*

i knew something was wrong the moment i got off the plane when i arrived back in Humboldt County here in North California. my coughing started. my throat wasn't irritated at ALL during my trip in North Carolina.

now i'm back here, and my coughing is really bad. i don't know if it's bronchitis. my tonsils aren't swollen. it's just that whenever i breathe (apparently i must do this to live..), i cough. then another cough. repeated coughs until i lose my breath.

i can't live off of HALLS Fruit Breezers forever.. although, i've been eating them like candy for the past few weeks.

i'm allergic to Eureka. i was told that it might be the pollen, the mold, the paper/pulp mill (that spews out white clouds [maybe toxic vapors?] from it's towering smokestack near the Samoa Beach area). i'm not allergic to anything. *knocks on wood* But being here has made me sick very often. unusually more than usual. Jeff has been sick at least 5x. and i rarely get sick. the last time i was sick was probably more than a year ago since i've moved here to Eureka.

Do you think that people here are dying? I suppose. Slowly dying.. the stores are closing and moving down. i saw an auto dealership that used to be full of cars suddenly abandoned (like who can afford nice cars here? everyone has 'dinged up and fucked up' looking cars).

hopefully there will be a chance for me & jeff to move outta here right after this summer. i hope. i seriously can't take it.

a day or so ago, a regular came in and we started talking about how i ended up living here from North Carolina. i get this question SOOOO MANY times. it's not fuckin' funny. and of course, i can't tell strangers something like this: "well, to be honest with you.. my boyfriend was hired for job here and i happened to come along because we are obviously in a relationship". Well, that's pretty awkward to tell someone. I'm out, but i'm not like FLAMING out. i don't play that homie. i still act professional, whether you know that i'm gay or not. Anyways, i usually tell them that he's my roommate who got a job here and i 'spontaneously' wanted to experience California since i've never been here before. that's partially true.

well, i lost track of what i was writing about. i'm taking a break (again) just to type this. sipping on a cup of orange juice, and that's soothing my throat. i haven't coughed since i've started typing this entry. so that's cool.

that's it for now.. i really don't want to spend my entire summer dealing with classes. i'm starting to feel like i should just temporarily stop my online classes at NC State for this Fall. until i resume classes again ON campus and in a REAL classroom, where i can fall asleep in class.. haha. I'm also thinking about transferring to a new college once i move somewhere different back on the east coast.. maybe in Miami? i wish. i really don't know. i can only hope..

~lor